NLP Email Training 04

Quote

“The great aim of life is not knowledge but action.”

Thomas Henry Huxley

Topic: Calibrating Part (1)

Our topic over the last few weeks has been perception.
You did the exercises, right? Or?
If not, at least catch up on them in a short form now. It will benefit you more than just hoarding the emails.
I know, we humans can be a bit sluggish, and what costs nothing is worth nothing!?
Do you think so?
I hope not, because the next lesson is waiting for you!

Calibrating means tuning in to the person opposite you, aligning with them. In NLP, we assume that every person is unique and individual. Statements of body language and their interpretation do not apply equally to all people in every situation. Therefore, I must adjust to the person who is currently in front of me. They are the most important person to me at that moment. Calibrating is essentially nothing new for you. You have done it many times, for example, when you answer the phone and already know how the person is feeling after their first "Hello!?" Your past perceptions help you interpret the tone and pitch correctly and recognize the underlying feelings.

Exercise for this week

a) Observe the body language of your conversation partner and try to recognize their inner state (the mood, such as joy, sadness, enthusiasm, irritability, etc.). Later, you can verify your hypotheses.

b) Today, with every person you encounter, say: "You are important to me right now." Then specifically observe their facial expressions (especially eyes, mouth, nose) and note the changes when their mood shifts. Be open to your counterpart.

c) Pay attention today to the feeling in your hand with every handshake. Is the pressure strong or weak? Is the hand warm or cold? Is it large or small? Consider whether you could identify the person with this handshake even in the dark.

d) Prick up your ears and perceive the emotional state of the other person from the sound of their voice. You can train this well over the phone. Listen attentively to your conversation partner's voice. Pay attention to speed, volume, and tone. Remember these characteristics. When you hear them again, you can recognize the state of the other person.

Next week, there will be some more exercises to help you become really fit in calibrating!

Supplementary Links

Audio

Calibrating >>>
A brief introduction to the concept of calibrating.

Text

Classical body language >>>
Here you will find more on the topic of body language.

Metaphor of the Week

The frog in the pot

If you throw a frog into a pot of hot water, the green fellow jumps right out of the pot. He may have gotten a few small burns, but they are soon overcome... and he continues to live happily!

However, if you put a frog in a pot of cold water and then slowly heat the water, the frog will stay in the pot. He stays and stays and stays... until he dies in the hot, boiling water!

And just like this frog, many people experience the same: They live their lives in such a way that it gradually, but surely, gets worse... but they cannot manage to change this life, to jump out of the pot. Yes, due to the slow deterioration, many people often do not even notice that their quality of life is turning increasingly negative.

Book Recommendation

Body language and communication – The handbook for nonverbal communication

Short Description:
From animal to toddler to adult, it is shown how movements – even the smallest gesture – provide information about one's state of being. A standard work to reduce misunderstandings in interpersonal relationships and to better analyze situations. It describes not only the phenomena that are usually perceived unconsciously, but also practical applications in education, therapy, and vocational training. The book is aimed at both professionals and interested readers who want to become more aware of their nonverbal communication.

Here the book can be ordered.

General Information

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Archive

We have created an archive with past lessons and links. There you will also find this lesson again as a webpage in HTML. There are always some email programs that display strange characters and do not receive clean emails in either our text or HTML format. In this case, use the online archive to read the lessons. Also, use the archive if you are quickly looking for a link, have lost one of the previous lessons, or have not received a lesson. HERE is the archive of past lessons

Advanced NLP Seminars

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Live your dream!
Stephan Landsiedel