NLP Email Training 03

Quote

“There is no reality except the one contained within us. That is why so many people live such an unreal life, because they consider the images outside them to be reality and never allow their own world to speak.”

Hermann Hesse

Congruence

Personal congruence is one of the most important concepts in NLP. It means the alignment of words, tone, body language, and actions. Someone who says, “I’m doing great?” in a whiny voice is not congruent. Their words do not match the whiny tone. In this case, most people would believe the tone over the content of the words. Below, you will find some examples of this in the supplementary links under “Audio.”

In a study, a researcher found that we convey about 7% of our information through content. The remaining 93% is divided into 55% body language and 38% voice and tone. If the body language does not match the content, most people become suspicious and are more likely to believe the body language. We have probably all experienced being deliberately lied to. Most people find it much harder to disguise their body language.

Exercise for This Week

a) Pay attention to the congruence (alignment) of words and tone. Does your counterpart mean what they say, or do you have a different impression?

b) Are you congruent yourself? Do you speak with joy in your voice and body language? Pay special attention for a day to ensure that your body emphasizes the impact of your words.

c) Consciously lie and make sure you lie congruently, i.e., avoid blushing and gestures of embarrassment when telling something untrue.

Supplementary links

Audio

Congruence »»»
Examples of congruent and incongruent statements.

Text

Congruence and Authenticity »»»
Some thoughts on the difference between congruence and authenticity.

Metaphor of the Week

The Wisdom of the Universe

Long ago, the gods thought it would be very bad if humans found the wisdom of the universe before they were truly mature enough for it. So the gods decided to hide the wisdom of the universe in a place where humans would not find it until they were mature enough.

One of the gods suggested hiding the wisdom on the highest mountain on Earth. But the gods quickly realized that humans would soon climb all the mountains and the wisdom would not be safely hidden there. Another suggested hiding the wisdom in the deepest part of the sea. But even there, the gods saw the danger that humans would find the wisdom too early.

Then the wisest of all the gods made his suggestion: “I know what to do. Let us hide the wisdom of the universe within humans themselves. They will only search for it there when they are mature enough, for they must go on an inner journey to find it.”

The other gods were thrilled with this suggestion, and so they hid the wisdom of the universe within humans themselves.

Book Recommendation

Way up – Living Your Own Dream

Short Description:
Workbook for personal development with NLP. Treasure trove and training program for anyone who wants to continue working on their personality. Very well-founded presentation of NLP – very understandable even without prior NLP knowledge. Simple and lively language. Find the vision of your life and transform it step by step into achievable plans for all areas of your life. Unleash the power of your beliefs and create an irresistible future for yourself. Achieve fantastic states within fractions of a second, in which you are unstoppable.

Learn the strategies of top experts and use them to achieve your own success. Develop unshakable self-confidence and break through your success barriers. Build harmonious and lasting relationships with partners, family and friends, employees, and customers.

The book can be ordered here.

General information

Archive

We have created an archive with past lessons and links. There you will also find this lesson again as a webpage in HTML. There are always some email programs that display strange characters and do not receive clean emails with our text or HTML format. Use the online archive to read the lessons in this case. Use the archive also if you quickly need a link, have lost a previous lesson, or have not received a lesson. HERE is the link to the archive of past lessons

Further NLP seminars

Of course, we also offer real seminars with personal encounters. This starts with our free NLP evening seminars in various cities in Germany and goes up to entire twenty-day trainings: Practitioner, Master, Trainer, and Coach.

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You are receiving this email because you or a friend ordered it directly from me. If you no longer wish to receive the email training, please use the link provided above the logo to unsubscribe. There you can also change your email address.

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Stephan Landsiedel