Conversational Postulate
Definition
A conversational postulate is a linguistic form that is structured like a question but aims at an action rather than a response. It consists of indirect requests or suggestions that appear as questions in conversation but often lead the other person to a specific behavior – without provoking open resistance.
Example: "Could you please open the door for me?" – The question is rarely answered with "Yes" or "No," but rather with the action: the door is opened.
In NLP, conversational postulates are considered embedded commands that can bypass the critical consciousness through their indirect form. They are a central element in the Milton Model, which describes hypnotic language patterns.
Origin and Theoretical Background
The concept originally comes from pragmatic linguistics and communication psychology, particularly from the works of Paul Grice (Maxims of Conversation).
Conversational postulates were introduced into NLP by Richard Bandler and John Grinder, who relied on the language patterns of Milton H. Erickson, a pioneer of modern hypnotherapy.
Basic assumptions in NLP:
- Communication operates through language, even when the message is not directly spoken.
- The unconscious particularly responds to indirect, non-threatening language.
- People often behave according to unspoken social expectations, e.g., an implicit request in the form of a polite question.
Application Examples
-
Therapist: "Can you imagine that this can change?"
→ The client begins to explore possibilities internally – an indirect suggestion.
-
Coach: "Would you allow yourself to prioritize just yourself today?"
→ The structure encourages the unconscious to work without triggering resistance.
-
Sales: "Could you imagine what it would be like to make your everyday life easier with this product?"
→ Suggestive invitation to identify with the purchase vision.
Areas of Application
- Hypnotherapy (especially according to Milton Erickson)
- Coaching (for indirect goal activation)
- Sales and marketing (objection prevention through indirect suggestion)
- Negotiation (implicit steering of the conversation)
- Education/Training (gentle guidance towards desired behavior)
- Conflict resolution (to avoid confrontation)
Methods and Exercises
1. Typical application in NLP:
Questions that could formally be answered with yes/no often automatically generate an action in the other person.
Example sentence patterns:
- "Could you ...?"
- "Have you ever noticed ...?"
- "Would you be willing to ...?"
- "Do you actually know that ...?"
2. Exercise:
- Create a list of everyday commands (e.g., "Open the window!").
- Transform them into conversational postulates: "Could you please open the window?"
- Pay attention to the effect of such questions in everyday conversations.
Synonyms and related terms
Synonyms:
- Indirect suggestion
- Hypnotic language patterns
- Indirect command
Related terms:
- Embedded Commands
- Milton Model
- Indirect language patterns
- Linguistic softeners
Distinction:
Unlike direct commands, conversational postulates generate less resistance as they seemingly leave the decision to the other person. They also differ from normal questions, as they do not ask for information but for behavior.
Scientific or Practical Benefit
Practical benefits:
- Reduces resistance through indirect communication
- Enables rapport maintenance in sensitive conversations
- Activates the unconscious for collaboration (e.g., in trance induction)
- Helpful in leadership, therapy, coaching, education
Scientific context:
Although conversational postulates have not been empirically isolated in NLP, there are studies on the effectiveness of indirect suggestions and Ericksonian hypnosis, e.g., in pain therapy, anxiety management, or personal development.
Criticism or Limitations
- Suspicion of manipulation: If used improperly, conversational postulates can be perceived as manipulative.
- Potential for abuse: In advertising or sales, they can be used in ethically questionable ways.
- Not always effective: Not everyone reacts equally strongly to indirect language patterns – context and rapport are crucial.
- Language barriers: In other languages or cultures, the principle may function differently.
Literature and References
- Bandler, R., & Grinder, J. (1975). The Structure of Magic I. Science and Behavior Books, Palo Alto.
- Bandler, R., & Grinder, J. (1996). Patterns of the hypnotic techniques of Milton H. Erickson, M.D. (Vol. 1). Meta Publications.
- Erickson, M. H. (Ed.). (1980). The Collected Papers of Milton H. Erickson on Hypnosis (4 volumes). Irvington Publishers, New York.
- Hall, L. M. (2000). Hypnotic language: Its structure and use. Neuro-Semantic Publications.
- Watzlawick, P., Beavin, J. H., & Jackson, D. D. (1974). Human Communication: Forms, Disturbances, Paradoxes (7th ed.). Huber.
- Grinder, J., & Bostic St. Clair, C. (2001). Whispering in the Wind. John Grinder & Carmen Bostic.
