NLP Email Training 32

Quote
If one does not know to which port one is sailing, no wind is favorable.
Seneca

Well-formed Goals

If you want to achieve something in this life, you should set goals, both big and small. Set goals for your life, the next 10 years, this year, this month, this week, this day, etc. Keep your goals in mind repeatedly. It's best to think about your big dream every day!
A goal is a concrete and sensually perceptible desired outcome. In NLP, there are a number of criteria for well-formed goals. When these criteria are applied, a wish or dream turns into something concrete – a goal.

Exercise for This Week

a) Take some time to dream. Think about what you really want in your life. Maybe you've read my book: Way up – Living Your Own Dream read and completed the exercises in it, then you know exactly what I mean. Think about the different areas of your life: finances, partnership, career, personality, social, spirituality, leisure. Write down your dreams. As they come. Create wonderful images in your mind. Do not select. Act as if you were a little child compiling a wish list just before Christmas. Santa Claus can fulfill every wish.

b) Consider your dreams. And write a number behind each one, by when you want to have realized it. If it should be in ten years, then write 10, if it should be in 5 years, then write 5, if it should be achieved in a month, then write 1 month, etc. Make sure you have short- and long-term wishes.

c) Choose some important goals from your wish list that are in the range of one year and mark them. Write them on a separate page and leave space behind each goal. Formulate the goal. Write a complete sentence.

d) Check this sentence against the well-formedness criteria: If a criterion is not met, then reformulate your goal:

• Is the goal itself achievable? It must be within your sphere of influence, because only then can you control the implementation yourself.
• Is the goal positively formulated? Have you avoided comparisons and negations?
• Is the goal ecological? Have you ensured that achieving the goal has no negative consequences or unacceptable side effects?
• Is the goal sensually concrete? What do you see, what do you hear, what do you feel when you have achieved the goal? Imagine you already had it – what would it be like?
• Is the goal embedded in a context? Do you want the goal in multiple contexts (professionally, privately, with all people, always)?

e) Does the goal have the right size? What would be intermediate and sub-goals? How do you know you are on the right track? What review criteria are there? Try to keep this feedback sheet as short as possible so that you can make corrections immediately if necessary.

f) Find an anchor for your goal. If you dream of a house, then find a picture of a house that looks like your dream house from a magazine or draw it yourself. If you want more self-confidence, then imagine how you would have more self-confidence – what could remind you of it? Place this anchor in a place in your home, at work, or in the car, so that you are always reminded of what your goal is.

g) Start with the first step. Do something every day if possible – even if it's just a very small step – to get a little closer to your goal. Even the journey to the moon begins with the first small step out the front door. A great novel is created by writing one page after another. Each of these small steps is infinitely valuable. Every brushstroke by Picasso is a part of the masterpiece. Make your life a masterpiece!

Supplementary links

Audio:
Formulating Goals >>>
What is important when a goal is formulated?
Sensory-specific Concrete Goals >>>
What is a sensory-specific defined goal?

Text:
Formulating Goals >>>
Here you can read how goals should be formulated to lead to the desired success.

Metaphor of the Week

The Motivation Professor in the Quarry

Some of you know this story because I like to tell it in my goal and time management seminars:

A motivation professor has dedicated his life to the question: What motivates people? One day he walks through the forest and comes across a quarry. And being psychologically motivated as he is, he looks at the different work behaviors of the people in this quarry.

And the first one he notices is a real bureaucrat, who only makes a hammer blow when his boss is watching. ping ... ping ... (whistles) ... ping. And the motivation professor goes up to him and asks how much fun he has at his work. The guy looks at him completely horrified and replies: “What? Grandpa, do you want a beating? Ever heard in your life the term ‘stone breaking’? This is stone breaking here. Get lost.” The motivation professor apologizes “Okay, okay, okay” and moves on.

The next one he meets is already working a bit more committed. Dong, Dong, Dong, Dong. “Excuse me, I’m just watching you work, wanted to ask how your work motivates you.” – “Yes,” says the man, “when it’s such a bright day, the sun is shining like today in May, we have a great team atmosphere, just got new chisels and I have some challenging tasks, then I feel super great – we had a barbecue yesterday, buddy had a birthday, gave a treat. I’m in a super good mood.” – “Yes,” says the motivation professor, “and otherwise?”

“Yes, you know, on such a gray November day, and when there’s this mobbing, they steal your new chisels and then they only have such old block stones to break and then this bad climate in the team – no one can stand that.” “Aha,” says the motivation professor, “for you, it’s like the environment decisively motivates you, decides whether you’re in a good or bad mood.” – “Yes, isn’t it like that for everyone?” – “For many, it is,” he says and moves on.

Then he sees a third: a Michelangelo type. Babbababam. He doesn’t let himself be disturbed at all, everything superfluous flies away and what he is constructing takes shape. At first, he doesn’t dare to speak to him. “Excuse me, I’m a motivation professor. Can you tell me how work like ‘stone breaking’ motivates you so much? Because I see that you are really motivated.” And the man looks at him completely horrified and bewildered: “Stone breaking? Don’t you see? I’m working here on the final vault for the Cologne Cathedral!”

And now my coaching question to you: Do you have your Cologne Cathedral?
We all have to break stones from time to time, we all have routine tasks of everyday life. What is the connection between these everyday tasks and your Cologne Cathedral?

Book Recommendation

NLP in Action. The Art of NLP as Applied Psychology in Daily Life and Professional Communication Authors: Thomas Rückerl and Jörn Ehrlich Short Description: This book shows you how to effectively use the psychological tools of NLP in everyday situations both professionally and in private contact. As a reader, you take a look behind the scenes of NLP and decipher many secrets of successful communication. Through the vivid presentation of psychological content, it becomes easy for every reader to understand why the art of NLP, after the healing practices of psychotherapists, is now conquering the executive floors of the business world. Moreover, the fascinating method is gaining increasing interest in the general public. Each chapter contains an extensive training program with many practical exercises, and in the last chapter, you will find a selection of NLP checklists. You will be motivated to not only store your psychological insights as knowledge but to consistently put them into practice. Here the book can be ordered: Now at Amazon

General information

Archive
We have created an archive with past lessons and links. There you will also find this lesson again as a webpage in HTML. There are always some email programs that display strange characters and do not receive clean emails in either our text or HTML format. Use the online archive to read the lessons in this case. Use the archive also if you are quickly looking for a link, have lost one of the previous lessons, or have not received a lesson.
HERE is the archive of past lessons.

Further NLP seminars
Of course, we also offer real seminars with personal encounters. This starts with our free NLP evening seminars in various cities in Germany and goes up to entire twenty-day trainings: Practitioner, Master, Trainer, and Coach.

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Stephan Landsiedel