The Concept of Triads

What Is a Triad?

A triad consists of three people who are in contact with one another. Within any triad, there are seven distinct perception and communication units: three monads (each person’s relationship with themselves), three dyads (the relationships between each pair within the triad), and one triad (the system as a whole).

We encounter this structure naturally within families — for example, mother, father, and child — but triads also appear in other areas of life such as friendships, teams, or workplaces.

Our original family triad (mother, father, child) plays a profound role in shaping our identity and self-worth. Early in life, we are dependent and tend to view our parents as all-powerful. Over time, this perception shifts toward a more realistic understanding. However, our childhood memories are often a blend of reality, interpretation, and imagination — filtered through our early attempts to make sense of the world.

One of the core challenges within the family triad is that a child may learn different behavioral rules in dyadic versus triadic contexts (for example, what is acceptable when alone with the mother may change when both parents are present). Because these early learning experiences occur unconsciously, they tend to persist into adulthood and influence other triads and life situations.

What Characterizes a Healthy Triad?

In a healthy triad, each person has the freedom to comment, respond, and express their feelings. Relationships are based on mutual respect and authentic communication. Each member is free to describe their experience of a situation and to verify their perceptions. There is no pressure toward conformity — everyone is allowed to think, feel, and act in their own way. Additionally, healthy triads can handle sub-grouping (two people connecting more closely for a moment) without exclusion or fear.

Experiential Exercises

Virginia Satir developed a number of experiential exercises to help participants re-experience and understand emotions within triadic relationships. These exercises allow people to reconnect with early fears and hurts from their family triads, understand how these experiences shaped their behavior, and learn to communicate more openly and compassionately in the present.

Form groups of three, act out the following scenarios, and discuss your experiences afterward: