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Introduction and Overview
Meta-programs are person-specific perception filters. They are structures and patterns of our mind that determine our thinking and behavior. They determine how we distort, delete, and generalize information.
Pay attention to this. This unit is about being aware of, recognizing, and expanding a person’s meta-programs.
Meta-programs are especially important in:
- Building rapport
- Changing one’s perception of the world
- Flexibility in communication
- Modeling high-level behavioral patterns
- Considering attitudes and evaluating responses
- Team building
Among the various meta-programs, some of the following will be identified: name of the meta-program and names of the types that make up this meta-program; a description of the characteristics of this type and how to recognize this type.
Some classifying questions will help in recognizing meta-programs. These questions allow you to collect information about the type. See the sections “Recognizing and Identifying” for answers we can use to identify the different types.
For many types a statistical distribution will also be provided. However, this is to be regarded as very crude. Detailed research studies are pending. There are also some language patterns that are particularly useful when communicating with the type.
Overview of emotional characteristics
Active, short, clear sentences
Try, think, could, wait
|What is important to you in your work?||Criteria|
|Why is (criterion) important? (Ask yourself this question three times.)||Direction||Towards:
achieve, obtain, include
avoid, exclude, see problems
|How do you recognize that you have done a good job?||Source||Internal:
knows it him/herself
others, facts, number
|For what reasons have you decided to do (your current work/job)?||Reason||Optional:
criteria, possible choices, opportunities
stories, how and why, no choice, necessity
|What is the relationship between (your work this year and last year)?||Decision factors||Matching:
the same, no changes
Matching with exceptions: more, better, comparisons
differentiation and matching with exceptions
Overview and characteristics of processing information
|Amount of information||
Details, sequences, exact
Overview, overall picture, arbitrary, sequence/order
|Direction of attention||
shallow, short, monotonous reactions
lively, expressive, automatic reactions
|Describe a project that you had difficulties with.||Reaction to stress||
Active, short, clear sentences
Try, think, could, wait
does not react with feelings
|Describe a work situation that was (criterion of the person). What did you like about it?||Style, organization||
alone, I / me, sole responsibility
leading role, others are present
we, team, shared responsibility
focuses on feelings and thoughts, these become his/her task
focuses on tasks, systems, ideas, instruments
|How can you improve your career prospects? How can someone else improve their job prospects?||Control structure||
My rules apply to me / My rules apply to you
My rules apply to me / doesn’t matter
Don’t know / My rules apply to you
My rules apply to me / Your rules apply to you
|How do you recognize that a colleague does his job well? How many times does someone have to demonstrate this before you are convinced?||Convincer channel and mode||
See, hear, read, do :|
when in doubt, yes
constantly anew, never convinced
provide time period
Activity meta-program: Proactive - Reactive
Does a person take the initiative or wait for others to take the initiative?
This meta-program allows us to predict how much energy someone will invest in achieving their life goals. In addition, this meta-program tells us something about how quickly someone begin to act in a given situation.
When you get into a situation, you are quick to act after reviewing the situation, or do you prefer to study it carefully?
These people are active. They want to make something happen, to get something going. These are people who make history, who change the world. Entrepreneurs, doers, etc. These people go out into the world and explore it, they are hands on and anything but hesitant. They usually take the initiative first in any group. Of course, they are likely to be the first to make mistakes, but they are the ones who do something when the others do not dare. They pounce on situations and are good at doing what they need to do without beating about the bush.
These people are more likely to let things run their course, rather than getting them going. The prototype would be the scientist in his ivory tower. This is more the passive type. They are reluctant to jump into a situation before they have thoroughly analyzed it. They often act only when forced to do so. Their motto is: "Don’t rush into anything!" Often bureaucrats end up in this program: "Don’t make mistakes!" With this meta-program one has the impression that things just happen in life. "I am a victim of my environment". These people believe in luck and destiny. They spend a lot of time waiting.
Some people show features of both types. They have the energy to do something to reach their goals while being able to see the consequences of their actions in each situation.
They neither study nor do anything! Their motto: "Enjoy the day and let God be a good person." They tend to ignore events that do not suit them. Such people are rarely found in the business world. They are more likely to be found at home.
Of course, these four subdivisions do not include everything that exists: refined categories may be introduced as needed, e.g. super-active, reflective, apathetic, etc.
(according to Rodger Bailey)
proactive: 15-20%, equally proactive and reactive: 60-65%, reactive: 15-20%
Recognizing and identifying
Short sentences: subject, active verb, concrete object.
The person speaks as if in control of their surroundings.
In extreme cases, this person rolls over everything like a steamroller.
Incomplete sentences, missing verb or subject. Passive or noun converted from verbs.
The person speaks as if controlled by the world, as if things happened to him, believes in luck or fate.
Long and nested sentences.
Frequent mention of reflection, analysis, understanding, waiting or principles.
Conditional sentences, would, could, should.
Extremely careful; needs to understand and analyze.
Signs of impatience, talking fast, tapping a pencil, moves a lot, difficulty sitting quietly for a long time.
Can sit a long time without difficulty.
|Effective language patterns|
(Let’s) get going; just do it; why wait; right now; immediately; take care of it; You can do x; take the initiative; take control; do what you think is right; what are you waiting for; let’s hurry.
Let us think about it; after we have analyzed it; that will tell you why; consider the following; that will make it clear to you; consider your reaction; you could consider; the time is right to ....; You will have luck with it.
- proactive: "I meet with my team once a week."
- mostly proactive: "I meet with my team when necessary."
- reactive: "I meet with my team to discuss the current events. It's important to keep up to date. "
- mostly reactive: "You may wonder if it is necessary to meet with the team once a week, but I do it because it is important to make everyone feel they are being listened to."
- reactive: "While everyone may wonder if it is really necessary to meet every week, it is important to consider the need of employees to voice their opinions."
What words will trigger a physical and emotional reaction in the person?
The terms people use are meaningful to them in a given context. They are "stimulus words" because they are associated with emotions and memories.
What do you expect from ... (your work, a house, a partner, etc.)?
What is important to you?
What matters to you?
What is indispensable for you? (What features does a product need to have in order to buy it?)
What would you like to have, be or do?
Hierarchy of criteria
Find out the hierarchy of criteria. Proceed exactly as with finding a hierarchy of values.
Effective language patterns
Use a person's criteria to gain and retain his interest. When someone hears his own criteria, he will immediately experience the emotions associated with those words.
Meta-program: Direction of motivation – the carrot or the stick
Motivation type: towards and away from
What moves a person to action? In which direction does the person move? Does he move toward goals or motivated by problems that need to be solved or prevented?
People are motivated in two different ways: they are approaching something, i.e., they are looking for something that they would like to reach (towards) or they avoid something, i.e., they do something so that something unpleasant does not occur (away from).
People who are looking for something stay focused on their goal. Their thinking is determined by the goals they want to achieve. They are motivated to get something or to achieve something. As they focus on the goals that they want to achieve, they are generally good at managing priorities. They also draw energy and enthusiasm from their goals. People who have a strong towards-something pattern often find it difficult to spot or notice problems when something should be avoided. In extreme cases, they can appear naive to others because they do not consider possible obstacles.
These people act primarily in order to avoid unpleasant things and to get rid of unpleasant things. They usually have difficulty focusing on one goal and implementing priorities appropriately. These people are very easily upset by negative situations. They are most responsive to threats.
Values represent the things that we want to move to or away from. They are the ones that motivate us the most. Values tell us where we invest time and energy. To motivate someone, it is very important to know their values.
- What do you want?
- What do you want from your new job?
- What is most important to you about your house?
- What do you pay most attention to when buying a car?
- What are you most interested in in interpersonal relationships?
- What is important to you in your job?
- What is important to you in your love relationship?
(General pattern: What do you want from X? or "What should X do for you?")
Recognizing and identifying
People who are motivated by seeking prefer to talk about what they want, what they have planned for the future, what they want to achieve, etc.
People who are motivated by avoiding prefer talking about things they do not want, how they can best avoid certain situations, and how they can change existing unpleasant situations.
Seeking 40%, Seeking and Avoiding 20%, Avoiding 40%
|Seeking / towards something||Avoiding / away from|
|Language patternget, reach, include, win, receive, enable, etc.|
avoid, let go, reject, exclude, stay out, not get involved, be on the safe side. Security
|Sentence structurespeaks of what will be gained and achieved
Says what he wants, names goals
mentions situations that are avoided or problems that need to be addressed
Exclusion of unwanted situations and things
|Body languagepoints to things, nods his head, gestures of inclusion|
Gestures of exclusion, shaking heads, arms express that something should be avoided or eliminated
- towards something: "I would be promoted and personally satisfied."
- primarily towards something: "I would be promoted, personally satisfied, earning more and not traveling that much."
- equally towards something and away from something: "I would personally be satisfied and not have to travel that much."
- primarily away from something: "I would not have this routine work anymore and would not be so disconnected from my family. Besides, I would be promoted."
- away from something: "I would get rid of this boring work and all these appointments and no longer have a boss who keeps looking over my shoulder."
I'm interested in a bank that is really customer-oriented. I want a job where I can be creative and well paid. I want an elegant and comfortable car with a reasonable gas mileage.
I hate it when I have to wait in the bank for a long time before it’s my turn and have to deal with my bank on every little matter. I definitely do not want a job where my boss keeps looking over my shoulder. What I hate most about a car is unreliability frequent repairs.
Meta-program: Source of motivation – Frame of reference internal or external
Where does someone find his motivation? In external sources or in internal values and beliefs?
This category deals with the source of motivation or, in other words, the place of motivation. This pattern affects how someone makes value judgments and decisions. If you try both patterns, you can decide which one to use best and when; the increase in your effectiveness will soon be noticeable.
There are two basic ways of assessing people, situations, events or things: internal and external.
People who have an internal reference evaluate things based on their own criteria, values and opinions. They have their own heads, make their own decisions and have their own motivations. They decide for themselves what and how they do something. They have difficulty accepting orders or instructions from other people and are not in a good position for receiving critical feedback. They are well able to take note of others' information and opinions, but ultimately they decide based on their own beliefs.
These people tend to judge things and events based on what other people think and say about them. These people need leadership and motivation from others. They have difficulty deciding on their own and need feedback from others to know if what they are doing is appropriate. They have difficulty starting or continuing a task unless someone else sets their goals, direction and course of action.
- How do you know that you are right?
- How do you know that you did a good job?
- How do you know that you have chosen the right bank?
- How do you know that you have chosen the right car?
- How do you know that you did your job well? (Do you notice it yourself or does someone have to tell you?)
- General pattern: "How do you know that you did the right thing with X?"
Recognizing and identifying
These people tell you what they have decided to do. They tell you that this or that feels right or that they know it is right. These people can be informed, but then decide based on this information itself. These people rebel immediately when someone tries to decide for them.
These people will tell you that they know this or that, because somebody else has told them, that because it's written here or there, etc. These people like it when others decide for them. They behave as if the information they receive is already a decision or an instruction. They need external standards and feedback to know if what they are doing is right or wrong.
I just know that. It feels right. I feel certain of that. I am convinced of that.
My boss told me. My customers expect that from me .... This is evident from the sales statistics. That's in every textbook.
Internal 40%, internal and external 20%, external 40%
|Language pattern"Only you can decide that." "The decision is entirely up to you." "It's important to me that you're 100% behind this decision." "Does it feel right for you?" "Does it meet your expectations? "Is that your goal?"|
"Experts agree that ..." "Research has shown ..." "Surveys have consistently shown that ..." "All your colleagues think that ..." "I will tell you how we ... " "In my opinion you should ... " Give clear instructions, praise and criticism.
|Sentence structureThey decide or know it themselves: "I just know it."
They evaluate their performance based on their own standards and criteria.
They resist when someone tells them what to do or make decisions for them.
Instructions from others are understood as information.
They let others or external sources of information decide or judge.
Must measure their work against an external standard or scale, such as checklists or quotas.
Information from outside is taken as decision or command.
|Body languageThey sit upright; show themselves; often pause before responding to someone else's evaluation in order to judge it; minimal gestures and facial expressions (in the frame of their respective culture)|
Gestures of exclusion, shaking heads, arms express that something should be avoided or eliminated
Meta-program: Thought process - Optional / Procedural
What does a person's thought process look like? Does a constant search for alternatives dominate or following established procedures?
Option-oriented people are motivated when they have the opportunity and the possibility to do something in a new way. There is always a better way for them to do something. They love to develop procedures and systems but have great difficulty in following them. If you give an option-oriented person an absolutely sure way to earn a million, they will try to improve the method. Unlimited possibilities and new ideas will have a tremendous pull on them. The opportunity to break or bend rules is irresistible to an option-oriented person. They like to develop new ideas and projects, but they do not necessarily feel the urge to complete them. They prefer to be involved in development and preparation rather than maintenance and preservation.
Procedurally oriented people are very good at following instructions and procedures. They feel comfortable and secure when they know exactly how to do something. They believe that there is the "right" or "best" way for everything. However, if the procedure they are using is not working or no longer working, and they do not get an alternative, then they quickly end up in a “stuck-state”, as their ability to invent a new course of action is very limited. They also have an obsessive desire to finish a job they have started.
Why did you choose this bank?
Why did you study X?
Why did you buy this car?
(General pattern: "Why did you just choose X?")
Recognizing and Identifying
People with this meta-program will give you reasons why they chose to do so and not otherwise; they will often talk about the other alternatives they have considered. They will point out further possibilities.
People with this meta-program will tell you how they came to make that decision, but in a way that sounds like there was no meaningful alternative at all. Things push this person, or they get into something, etc. They do not talk about choices, decisions, alternatives, etc.
I had the opportunity .... After much back and forth, I have decided for X. I always wanted to try something different. In my new job, I have the opportunity to travel abroad frequently.
I just drove down the main street and saw the bank sign there and then stopped immediately. I went in and opened an account.
optional: 40%, optional with procedural: 20%, procedural: 40%
Meta-program: Matching - Mismatching
How does someone react to changes? How often does someone need change? Is someone motivated by the search for "differences" or the search for "sameness"?
In any situation, a person's attention is focused on either sameness (similarity) or difference.
People who tend to sort by sameness are always attentive to their awareness of things that they already know, that they are familiar with. They like it when little or nothing changes in their world. They do not especially like changes. Job changes are enough every 15-25 years. Their motto is "There is nothing really new under the sun." They believe in the eternal recurrence of the same.
Matching with exceptions:
People who prefer this perceptual filter first look for equalities, for similarities, and then begin to perceive differences. They like it when things change only gradually and slowly. It enough for them to change their workplace every 5-7 years. Their maxim could be "Just don’t rush anything".
People with this perceptual filter constantly observe their surroundings from the point of view of: "What is different than before?" They love change and their motto in life could be "Nothing is constant except change," or they would agree with Heraclitus "You cannot enter the same river twice". They detest static and stable situations, organizations, belief systems, etc. They prefer revolutionary change, change for the sake of change. They are constantly reorganizing their office, their work processes, etc. If their job itself does not bring enough variety and change, they will often change jobs. They would like to have new tasks, work processes, etc. every 9-18 months.
Mismatching with exceptions:
These people first pay attention to differences and then to sameness and correspondence. They love change and variety, but these do not have to be revolutionary or abrupt. Changes in their tasks every 18-36 months are enough for them.
How would you describe what you are doing now relative to what you did a month ago?
What is the difference between your present and past profession?
(General pattern: "What is the difference or the relationship between X and X at an earlier time.")
Recognizing and identifying
These people will enumerate all the things that have remained the same, that have not changed, and even if they have pointed to differences, they will use phrases like, "That's right, but basically it’s still the same."
Matching with exceptions:
People with this perceptual filter always begin by pointing out sameness, similarities, and corresponding elements before mentioning differences. They will focus on how things have gradually changed over time. They often use comparatives like "It's better than ..." "There are more options now than before." "We have less stress today." "It's almost the same as ...".
People with this perceptual filter constantly point out what has already changed, how things and situations cannot be compared. Even if they point to an obvious similarity, they tend to say, "Yes, superficially, it may seem that way, but basically it's something completely different." They use words like new, change, difference, rapid development, revolutionary innovation, etc.
Mismatching with exceptions:
People with this perceptual filter always start with differences, deviations, and changes before pointing to similarities. They emphasize the change and perceive the sameness only in passing.
- Matching: "That's just like..." "I already know that from here and there." "That reminds me of X." "Just like it was back then."
- Matching with exceptions: "My new job is basically the same as before, except that I have more responsibility."
- Mismatching: "Since I changed my job, my work has changed completely."
- Mismatching with exceptions: "My job has changed fundamentally, except for the fact that I'm still in the same office."
People have certain preferences in their approach. Some love to have precise instructions that they can follow, while others prefer to just set a goal and find their own way there.
Meta-programs of information processing – Chunk Size: Overview - Detail
What is the size of the information units that the person handles best? Does he prefer to work with the overall view or with specific details?
People have preferences about how they want to present and be presented with information. Proceeding from an overview to the details or from the details to the overview.
These people first tell about the details and, if you want to explain something to them, are also first interested in the details. They feel very good with and have a talent for remembering many details. It is rather difficult for them to get an overview and for these people the saying goes that they do not see the forest for the trees. As a result, it's difficult for these people to prioritize. These people tend to regard overview types as babblers.
These people always give you an overview first and want to first to get an overview before they are interested in detail. For them, meaning comes from the "larger context". They think about the big picture in projects and not so much about the individual steps and details. These people often talk at such a high level of abstraction that one can have the feeling that they are talking about nothing or just incomprehensible generalizations. These people consider the detail type to be a small-minded type of “bean-counter” and, after a short time, are bored with the many details because they cannot put them into a larger context of meaning.
- Tell me what you would like.
- What is important to you in a personal bank?
- I would like to explain something to you: Would you like to get the big overview first or are you interested in the details first?
- What would you like to know about this project first?
- (General pattern: Listen to the different sentences and pay attention to the relationship between overview and detail.)
Recognizing and identifying
These people will first tell you all the details that seem important to them and will explain one process after another. In explanations and descriptions, they rarely indicate the objective and purpose, but rather the sequence. If they are interrupted, they often start over again. Conversely, these people will tend to ask for many details.
These people always start with the overview without going into the details. They describe the situation more by chance and often jump from one aspect to another without following any particular order. They often use short sentences without presuppositions. If they get too much detail, they are easily bored and will ask questions about their overall meaning.
"At my personal bank, it's important to me that it's within walking distance of the office, that it pay me at least 70% interest on my deposits, and that I can handle all my banking business through it."
"First we met Ed and then we went to the new steakhouse on Main Street, where Peter joined us later, and we all ordered a filet steak with French fries."
"I want a bank that is close by and pays high interest rates."
"We all went to dinner together."
Detail: 15%, Detail and Overview: 25%, Overview: 60%
speaks in sequences, step by step, abundance of modifiers, adverbs, adjectives, proper names for people, places and objects. When the sequence is interrupted, the person starts again from the beginning or at the point where it was interrupted, only seems to be to be aware of the step immediately before or after the step they are currently engaged in. No perception of the overall picture.
occasionally, things are presented in a random order, overview, big picture, concepts, summaries, simple sentences, few modifiers or details.
exact, specific, exact, precise, firstly ... secondly ... thirdly, then, afterwards, before, logically, consequential.
general, overview, context, general conditions, in principle.
Meta-program: Attention Sorting: Self - Others
Does the person sort for the nonverbal behavior of others or for their own internal experience? This category shows whether someone automatically perceives the body language and tonality of others and responds to them or not.
Sorting for Self:
Self-sorting people hardly betray feelings, even if they experience them. Sometimes there is a time delay between the perception of a stimulus and their reaction to it. They behave as they think fit. They are only convinced by the content, not by tonality, body language or any rapport accompanying the statement. They struggle to build rapport because they do not notice the body language of others and therefore overlook many hints and clues. They judge the quality of communication based on their own feelings. Therefore, they are usually not very skilled in interpersonal communication. In the context of work self-sorting people are mostly used as technical experts in areas for which communication skills are not crucial.
Sorting for Others:
Others-sorting people react automatically and reflexively to the behavior of others. They behave lively within their culture and respond to others with facial expression, body movement and vocal changes. They assess the quality of a communication based on the reactions they consciously and unconsciously perceive in the other person. They have a good ability to build or maintain rapport, provided they possess other relevant patterns as well.
Research into this pattern
Southwest Airlines has found that 95% of all complaints were caused by 7% of the workforce. Thereupon, an attitude test was made that mainly paid attention to whether someone sorted for himself or for others, and only candidates from the last group were hired. Since this measure, the airline has the fewest complaints since its inception.
Self 7%, Others 93%
Possibilities for recognition in conversation
Lack of culturally appropriate responses, such as nodding, "Hm-hm", etc., only responds to the content of what has been said, does not "pick up the pencil dropped by someone else," ignores or does not react to your tonality. Little or no facial expression or variation of tonality.
reacts to both content and non-verbal aspects of communication, responding with nods, body movements, "hm-hm" etc., vividly (in the frame of one’s culture).
Concentrate on the content, use the criteria as well as the Convincer channel and mode of your conversation partner.
They are influenced by the quality of the rapport.
Meta-program: Reaction to stress
How does a person react to stress in the context of a work situation?
Would you not be glad to find out in five minutes or even faster whether someone will be able to cope with a very stressful job?
The reaction to stress category refers to how someone, working in different situations, responds to pressures that are typical of the context. It's not about how someone would get along in an exceptionally dramatic stress situation, since almost everyone in these situations will show an emotional response. There are three different ways of responding to these "normal" stresses:
People with an emotional pattern react emotionally to normal stress in a work situation. They react with a feeling and stay in that feeling. Very stressful positions are therefore difficult to cope with in the long term.
Others will often feel that they overreact to situations or are hypersensitive. They work well in artistic or creative tasks where emotions are essential. When working as a salesperson, they find it difficult to deal with rejection, and thus avoid trying to acquire new customers.
Persons with a flexible pattern initially have an emotional response to normal stress in a work situation and can then decide whether to return to a non-emotional (neutral) state or not. They can choose. Because they themselves experience emotions, they can empathize with others - or decide not to. They are well suited for managing employees, as they can respond to others personally as well as, if necessary, distance themselves again.
People with a cognitive pattern do not react emotionally in the normal stressful situations of a particular context. They find it difficult to empathize with others because they do not react emotionally. They will not panic in most emergencies but keep a cool head. They provide reliable performance even in positions that involve heavy workloads
Question for pattern recognition
Tell me about a work situation that has caused you difficulties.
Then, as the person describes the situation, you need to judge if they are in an emotional state and cannot get out of that state, show an emotional response and get rid of it, or show no emotional response.
- shows a clearly emotional reaction in voice and behavior while describing a difficult situation.
- Changes in three or more of the following areas are indications of a change in the emotional state: posture, gestures, facial muscle tension, lowering of gaze, changes in timbre, tonality, speed, and volume of speech, remains in an emotional state throughout the course of the description.
- initially reacts emotionally and then returns to a neutral state.
- no emotional reaction
emotional 15%, flexible 70%, cognitive: 15%
Effective language patterns:
Express your enthusiasm and focus on the feeling, with words such as: intense; exciting; incredible; extraordinary, etc.
Choose words that indicate that you can experience emotions as you wish and then emerge from them again, for example: "You can really get excited about it and even realize that it makes perfect sense."
Present the logical facts: the hard reality; the bare facts; think clearly; statistics.
Meta-program: Working Style
In which environment is someone particularly productive: when working alone, when working with the participation of others, or when sharing responsibility with others?
The work style category allows you to find out or confirm how you work best; if you prefer to work with others, work by yourself and involve others or work all by yourself.
Many have more than one pattern in this category. Often there is a dominant and a secondary style in a given context. The three patterns in detail:
People who have an independent pattern in the context of work would prefer to work alone and bear sole responsibility. Their productivity suffers when others are present or when they have to share responsibility with others. If they are interrupted, they easily lose the thread. They prefer to work in their office with the door closed. In extreme cases, they forget to consult others (especially if they are internal). They can work long hours without missing contact with others.
"A camel is a horse designed by a committee" has probably been coined by someone with this pattern. In the role of a manager, a person with an independent pattern will do most of the work alone and probably have difficulty creating rapport.
Individuals with a proximity pattern want clear responsibility, but they also need others who are involved in their tasks or in the vicinity. They need clearly defined responsibilities, but if they are to be productive and motivated, their responsibilities must involve other people. Their productivity diminishes when they have to share responsibilities and authority or work completely alone. This pattern is best suited for managing employees and projects. A person with this pattern will make sure everyone knows what he's responsible for. Persons with a proximity pattern work well as supervisors. If you work as a subordinate, your responsibilities must be clear.
Cooperative people want to work with others and share responsibility. They believe in the synergy principle: 2 + 2 = 5, the whole is more than the sum of its parts. They struggle to meet deadlines and complete tasks when they need to work alone. They do not need an area for which they are solely responsible and, if they work as managers, they will want to do everything with their employees.
The Californian light bulb joke applies to these people. How many Californians do you need to screw in a light bulb? Six; one to change the light bulb and five to share the experience.
A cooperative pattern does not necessarily mean that the person is cooperating in the usual sense of the word, but merely that he or she must carry out an activity with other people.
Independent 20%, Proximity: 60%, Cooperative 20%
Tell me about an experience in your work that was (criterion of the person). What did you like about it?
Alternative: How long can you work alone in your office without calling someone or stopping by?
- says "I", "myself", "my responsibility"
- does not mention others
- the mentioned activity presupposes that she did it alone
- others are present, but "I did it"
- may or may not mention others, but the nature of the activity requires the presence of others (for example, selling or teaching)
- says "we", "us", "our task", "together" etc.
- involves others and shares responsibility
- Independent: "I developed the new program and examined it for errors."
- Independent and Proximity: "I developed the new program and then examined it with my team for errors."
- Proximity: "I developed the new program with my team."
- Proximity and Cooperative: "I developed the program with my team and then we ironed out the mistakes together."
- Cooperative: "We developed the new program and examined it for errors. It was a great team effort. "
- Independent and Cooperative: "I developed the new program, and then we all sat down together and examined the whole thing for mistakes."
do it alone; by yourself; you alone; without interruptions; You will have sole responsibility and control; Just close the door and take the receiver of the hook
You will be in charge; others will work on it, but that's your project. You take the lead; You are responsible for X, the others for Y.
we; us; together; we all; the team; the group; sharing responsibility; doing it together; You will not have to do this alone (away from); let us; we could do the following.
Meta-program: Work Organization
How does someone organize his work? Does the person focus more on thoughts and feelings or on ideas, systems, tools and tasks?
Work Organization describes whether someone focuses on feelings in their work or on getting things done. There are two patterns in this category:
Individuals who are person-related pay attention to feelings and thoughts, their own and others. Emotions gain such importance that they themselves become the task. These people will organize their work so that they can focus on people and their feelings. They easily manage to build rapport.
People who are object-related focus on products, ideas, tools, tasks and systems. They treat people and ideas as objects and believe that feelings have no place in the world of work. They want to do their job and are highly task-oriented.
Tell me about an experience in your work that was (criterion of the person). Wait for an answer: "What did you like about it?"
- talks about people, emotions, feelings
- calls people by name, uses personal pronouns
- persons occur in their sentences
- talks about processes, systems, tools, ideas, tasks, goals
- will not often mention people, except in the form of impersonal pronouns such as "they" or "one"
- people become objects, parts of processes
- person-related: "Mr. Richler was enthusiastic about my report, and I was quite happy with it."
- primarily person-related: "Mr. Richler was enthusiastic about my report, and I was pleased because it was quite a breakthrough for the entire company."
- equally person- and object-related: "Mr. Richler was enthusiastic about my report and it was quite a breakthrough for the company."
- primarily object-related: "My report was quite a breakthrough for the company. I liked my boss, too."
- object-related: "My report is quite a breakthrough for the company."
uses personal pronouns; names of persons; feelings; thoughts; experiences; "for you"; "for others"; "the people"; "our team"; "our group"
uses impersonal pronouns; things, systems; objects; tasks; aims; processes; finish tasks; focus on the task at hand; the goal; the enterprise.
Meta-program: Rule Structure
What behaviors does the person apply to himself and others?
The rule structure gives you information about a person's ability or willingness to set rules for himself and for others. There are four patterns in this category:
My / My: My rules apply to me / My rules apply to you
My / My people have rules for themselves and for others. They are ready to share their rules with others. Since they assume that all humans are similar, they believe that what is good for them is good for others as well. For example, they say, "In your place, I would ...." The vast majority of the population has this pattern in the context of a work situation, and probably in other contexts as well.
My / No matter: My rules apply to me / No matter
People with a My / No matter pattern have rules for themselves and do not care about others. They do not necessarily have evil intentions towards others; it's just not their problem or concern. These people often do what they need to do without thinking of others. Sometimes they are considered by others to be selfish because they simply do not consider anyone except themselves.
None / My: No rules or unknown rules apply to me / My rules apply to you
None / My people do not have policies or are unaware of these policies but are readily willing to pass on rules to others when they are assigned to them. As a result, they may struggle to find a direction or make decisions. They get stuck easily and then do not know what to do.
My / Your: My rules apply to me / Your rules apply to you
People with a My / Your pattern know what rules and guidelines to follow in the work, but they are unwilling or unable to communicate those rules to others. They start from a "to each his own" perspective. Believing that everyone is different, they would find it arrogant to tell others what to do. As a result, others are often unaware of their expectations. Here you will find the people who can understand a conflict from both sides, as hard as it may be for those of us who like to take a clear stand.
My / My 75%, My / No matter 3%, None / My 7%, My / Your 15%
Ask the following two questions and see if the person answers both questions or just one question.
- How can you improve your chances of success (at work)? Pay attention to the answer!
- How can someone else improve their chances of success (at work)?
To grasp this pattern, you will need to compare the answers to these questions. If someone does not know the answer to these questions, he will usually not hesitate for a long and then answer in an uncertain voice.
My / My:
The same answer to both questions, or it is easy for the person to answer both questions.
My / No matter:
Clear answer to the first question. Shows lack of interest in the second question.
None / My:
Do not know the answer to the first question. Has rules for the second question.
My / Your:
Has rules for the first question. Does not know the answer to the second question or does not prescribe a judgment.
My / My:
- Work more. Better organization.
- The same. Work more. Better organization.
My / No matter:
- Better organization
- Not my problem.
None / My
- Uhhh, hmmm ... don’t really know.
- Better organization.
My / Your
- Work more. Better organization
- Everyone is different
Meta-program: Convincer - Channel & Mode
Convincer - Channel
How do you know that someone is doing a good job?
must see evidence
needs an oral presentation, must hear something
must read something
must do something with the information
See: 55%, Hear: 30%, Read: 3%, Do: 12%
Effective Language patterns:
Formulate your communication so that the primary Convincer channel (see, hear, read, do) is addressed.
Convincer - Mode
How often does something have to happen (you must see, hear, read, do) until you are convinced?
- Several examples:
need a certain number of repeated presentations of the data in order to be convinced.
need little information and are immediately convinced. They almost never change their mind.
are never completely convinced. Every day is a new day and they have to be convinced again.
need to gather information for a while before they are convinced.
Several examples: 52%, Automatic: 8%, Consistent: 15%, Time: 25%
Effective language patterns
Use the number the person names.
You can assume: In case of doubt in favor.
Try it; every time you use it; every day; again and again. Use the same language patterns as for internals.
Use the same timeframe the person names.
People make decisions for four reasons: because it looks good, sounds convincing, feels right, or makes sense.
Why did you decide on that?
Why do you decide in that way?
Recognizing and identifying
People with this perception filter produce internal visual representations (pictures or films) that fulfill certain unconscious criteria and thus look "right". These people prefer to see the things they are supposed to make a decision on and therefore have a preference for graphs of data and process flows.
People with this perceptual filter represent the arguments for or against a decision as an inner dialogue. For them, a certain reasoning sounds right. They like to get things verbally explained and enjoy listening.
These people get certain body sensations when they imagine deciding for or against something. They then know by the nature of this body sensation whether it feels right or wrong. They prefer to do or try things, to try them out and to use them.
These people produce an inner representation through the use of words and images, which gives them a certain feeling, which they experience as "meaningful". The phrase "that makes sense" also refers to a feeling. These people love facts, data and justifications.
"I can well picture that."
"I have a clear idea."
"I have the overview."
"That's insightful." etc.
"That sounds right."
"That’s music to my ears."
"I have a good feeling about that."
"That's a solid decision (or a solid reason)."
"That makes sense."
"That’s a sensible explanation."
"I understand that."
Looks good 45%, Sounds convincing 10%, Feels right 40%, Makes sense: 5%
see, look at, vision, clear, enlightening, overview, picture, movie.
hear, sound, talk, listen, ask oneself.
make, feel, touch, get in touch. Experience, tangible, solid, with both feet firmly on the ground.
Sense, reason, rational, facts, data, justifications, evidence, documentation, instructions.
Meta-program: Judging - Perceiving
Humans refer to their environment either by judging or by perceiving.
People with this meta-program tend to make sure the environment adapts to them. They have a plan and purpose and organize their lives to be in accordance with their plans and goals. They like it when everything is neat and structured. They have no trouble forming an opinion about something and making a decision. Once they form an opinion, they stick with it until new information forces them to rethink it. They like it when something, e.g. a project is completed; They love to complete things.
People with this meta-program tend to adapt to the environment. They love to live in the moment and spontaneously do the things they feel like doing. They like to act on the basis of their intuition. It is extremely difficult for them to make a decision, and when they make one, they often change it very quickly. They like to keep many options open and avoid ending things for good.
Do you love to live your life spontaneously and in the moment?
Is it rather easy or difficult for you to make a decision?
Do you often change your mind?
Are you rather punctual or rather unpunctual for appointments?
Are you annoyed when someone else comes late to an appointment with you?
Recognizing and identifying
These people live according to a plan and love to make lists of what to do when and in what order. They love their time system and are happy when their appointments calendar is clear and concise. Without their schedule book, they only feel half human. They are on time or too early on dates and expect punctuality from others. They adhere strictly to agreements. They make decisions easily. They behave in such a way that they have as much control as possible over their living conditions.
These people love their spontaneity and therefore hate any kind of plan: daily schedule, fixed dates etc. They feel chained by such agreements and unfree. They often do not stick to agreements. They often come to appointments too late and generally have a bad sense of time. They are reluctant to choose, as they feel that they have cut themselves off from valuable options. They try to understand life and to adapt to it.
"I love it when everything is organized and planned."
"I have and use my time management system regularly."
"I usually stand by my decisions."
"I'm on time and expect this from others."
"I do not have a time management system and hate fixed dates."
"I’m there when I’m there."
"I'd rather keep my options open."
"I often change my mind."
"I often come too late, and it does not bother me when others are late."
Plan, procedure, order, punctual, commitment, decide, organize, completion, solve, control, structure, definitely, deadline.
Free, spontaneous, options, possibilities, wait, flexible, adapt, open-ended, intuitive, for now.